How I feel about you;

Yeah, I feel like copying Bomban on this one. I think now would be a good time to talk about everyone, or most people, that mean a lot to me.

So lets start off with you, BOMBAN:
-Every time I have a good moment with you, I think about the times when I thought you were nothing but a person who did crazy, weird things. Hahaha. I mean, I didnt think you were a bad person, at all. I just thought you were all for teh lulz. Haha. But Im glad to know you better now. And I enjoy seeing that "other side" of you. Really, you are one of the people who have helped me the most with all of the times I overthought me and Kirbys relationship. And Im grateful for you because of that. But not just that, Im thankful that you can listen to me rant about whatever. That I can joke around with you. That I can forget about all the strict rules of my life, and just... live. That we can talk about whats going on in our lives and help each other along the way. I know you dont believe me when I say this, but you and Kirby act so alike sometimes. In a good way, usually. And your new frames make you look so cute. Im not even kidding. Haha. And I really miss our fearsome foursome. Dont you? PS: I still think its so funny how you used to call me "daddy's little girl" over the summer. :P

PAOLA:
-Oh, yooooou. There is hardly ever a time that I dont like you. Haha. Lately, you have made me feel so, so, so good to have you around. And I love how we've known each other since you were like five. xD Or before that..? Haha. I like how you are easily amused. I like how youre simple and not too girly. I like how youre just, you. :] But I just want to say that Im sorry. Im sorry that I dont hang out with you as much during school. Please though, dont believe that Im just taking advantage of you.. or that Im getting tired of you. Because its not true. And Im pretty sure you will never think that, because youre just a really good friend and we dont have extreme restrictions or expectations like that. But yeah, the kind of friendship we share is different compared to everyone else. Remember, we're still going for that dream goal! If you know what I mean. ;D <3

ADRIAN:
-Bff. Forreal, that name fits you so well. There is nothing about you that I dont admire. Everything about you makes you seem .. so blessed. Youre truly a gift from God to me. I honestly dont know where I would be without you. And you have put up with me so much! I cant believe it. Four years and still going strong. :D Im sorry for ever letting you down. And Im sorry if I ever annoyed you, or if I was too blind to realize something about you. But I know for a fact that we will honestly be best friends forever. There is nothing that will tear us apart. Through the hearts of Jesus and Mary. [:

JC:
-I feel like we've been through a lot already. Not necessarily in a bad way, because now .. youre like my closest guy friend. Really, you are. And you know that already. Oh man, there is nothing wrong about you. Haha. Seriously, I dont like it when people talk about you because of what happened in the past. Because it doesnt really matter now. At least, to me it doesnt. Everything that we went through in the past lead to you becoming my best friend. And if someone is reading this and wonders why, its because I can relate to you on any level. Our connection is beyond explanation, isnt it? I mean .. yeah, there are times when I cant figure out how to help you, and Im sorry for that. And sometimes we dont talk as much like every other pair of best friends, but hey. I dont really mind, because I know that youre still there. And if someone ever tries to make you believe that you arent fit to be my best friend, theyre wrong. Thank you for everything. Dont change.

CAMILLE:
-You and me, Camille, you and me. Hahaha. Seriously, we have so many up and downs. And for all of the times I hurt you, for all the times that I gave you an attitude, and for all the times I made you feel like I didnt care about you, Im sorry. Please forgive me, bestfriend. You deserve so much better. You work so hard in life, and youre so jumpy when youre happy. I love it. Hahah. It gets kinda funny sometimes, but dear .. Im not laughing at you. Youre just cute. Hahaha. Thank you for putting up with me, forreal. I think you put up with me the most. Other than my mom, of course. Haha. And you give such great advice! Oh my goodness. I think I would be stuck in some hole if you never taught me everything you have. I think I would feel really hopeless if I never listened to what you had to say. Camille Ann Ducut Lapid, I love you, dont ever think otherwise. :D

NGHIA:
-Its really fun walking to class with you like every morning. It makes me smile; it makes me feel like the day is going to be a good one. And even though we both have been slacking a lot lately, passing notes with you is so fun! Its kinda cute, too. Haha. Sometimes I cant read what youre writing, but who cares. I always figure it out later. Hahaha. I told you this before, but I think its so much cooler when you say "Lulzy." It really fits your voice, Idk why. HAHA. But you are soooooo lulzy, Nghia. Thats one of the main reasons why I love hanging out with you. And Im not sure if it was just for "teh lulz" but youre pretty much one of my best friends too. xD I like having deep conversations with you, it really helps me and touches my heart. And riding in the car with you?! SO FUN. OMG. Its like riding a rollercoaster. I have never had so much fun in a car. Ever. And when we were listening to classical music? HAHA. And even though I forgot that it was illegal, driving your car in the parking lot was so exciting. Oh maaaaan. Hahaha. Ever since we became friends, you made just about every day go brighter, Nyeh. [:

ATE AMY:
-You make me smile, all the time. You really are like an older sister to me. In soooo many ways. Its all my fault that we dont see each other that often. D: And we havent been able to update each other lately. But seriously, Ate. Its soooo crazy. Everything that we have been talking about keeps connecting. So here I am, pretty much following the footsteps that you have been making. Haha. I feel like I could be a much better ading to you, Ate. I feel like we could be so much closer. Im sorry. But for now, Im grateful that God put you in my life. Please stay. [: Im always praying for you!

ANGELO:
-Im still trying to get used to the haircut. xP Lolololol. Thanks for letting me steal your game. It was really entertaining. You know what? When I was hanging out with you, Tim, and Audrey at Target the other day, I realized how much fun it is to be in your presence. Haha. Well, all three of you made my day. Honestly. Im glad that we've gotten closer since last year, and Im glad that we're able to have more serious conversations, and that we can confide in each other. Thank you for listening to all of my "problems." Or whatever they are. Because now that I think about it, I was probably just overexaggerating. Hahaha. Im praying for you, Angelo. I dont want too much of a barrier to get in between us, if you know what I mean.

MICHELLE:
-Mary Michelle Rose Estrada. :D I miss yoooou. I wish we saw each other more often. I wish we hung out more. I wish we talked more. I wish you could go to Landstown. :[ But its okay. Despite the distance, and the lack of time together, I know in my heart that we are still SPBFFLs. <3 Dearest, I love everything about you. You are the one of the best people to ever come into my life. Im so thankful that God brought you here to me. I hope nothing ever gets inbetween the two of us. PS: I hope you grow taller than me one of these days. Hahaha. :D

TYLER:
-Happy birthday, Mr. Capil. [: Since Michael, Queenie, and Kirby are probably still at your house, Im sure youre having a blast. I know we dont talk that much, and I actually want to change that. Because that one night that I got to talk to you was great. It just made me realize how much I could relate to you. Its crazy to see things connect between us, since we're just like .. friends because our friends are the same friends. Haha. But like I said, one day .. we'll be great friends. And it sucks because I hear about you having bad days, or days when youre just too tired. It makes me feel bad, really. Haha. But you seem to be a really cool kid. Stick around, okay?

MICHELLE:
-Angeline Michelle Cabarrubias Dumadag. I bet you a million dollars that I spelled that wrong. Shoooot. D: (I just changed it after I checked your tumblr.) Hahah. But I felt like trying to spell it cause it reminded me of your license. Haha. But you are such an amusing person. I always have a nice vibe around you. And youre easy to talk to; its never uncomfortable. You know so much, I can tell. I should come to you more often for advice. Haha. And christmas caroling practice is more fun because of you! I like the picture we took together. xD My chin is sexy....? Why thank you! Haha. "OH OKAY MY NAME IS RIA AND I HAVE A NICE CHIN BUT NO ONE TELLS ME. OH OKAY." Ahahaha. You is so funny. And when we were shoving our faces behind our binders to see if we both got the Alto One part down. Hahaha. I cant wait to spend more time with you.

JORNEL:
-Ah, you are so cute. I know you probably get tired of hearing that.. cause I say it so often. Hahah. But you'll be manly soon. I know it. Your voice is going to get really deep and soon, everyone will regret thinking you were 12. HAHA. But marketing class is soooooo great. And youre one of the main reasons. Especially when we work on our manual! Youre a freakin genius, Jor. I wish I was like you. Haha. Youre smart, youre attractive, you dress nicely, youre friendly, youre everything! Man. I just love joking around with you. And our webcam pictures are soooo gaaaawjusss. Oh mah gawsh. Haha. And having those serious talks with you and AJ mean so much to me. I will spend the rest of my life having you as a good friend. Deal? And thank you so much for listening to me rant all class last year in English. Haha.

MARLON:
-I dont think I have ever gotten upset with you. Haha. Or mad, or anything. You seem to be happy a lot. And thats a good thing! I strongly agree with you when you said that it feels like we've known each other forever. Ever since the first practice for Kims debut that we got paired up together, I have grown to be really comfortable around you. And its fun to mess around with you. Your facial expressions are so funnny. We already have so many memories that I wont ever forget. Like the time you ripped your gray pants. Dx Haha. And the time you and Ronnie sneaked into my house, and the time you went all the way to my house to use the bathroom. LOLOLOLOLOL. And all the times I had to help you find Katie during homecoming. And Jor's birthday lunch when you made the black waiter laugh when you said, "Those are the gay boy desserts." to Chris and Aldric. HAHAHAHA. Oh man. Btw, your smile is soooooo cute. Ah. xP

JULIE:
-Sometimes I look at you, and I think to myself .. "I want to be like her one day." You are so pretty, Julie. Its undeniable. But its not just your appearance, your personality is so strong and likeable. And that talk that I had with you really meant something to me. A lot, actually. I hope that we can have more conversations like those. Because on some days, I just never find the right person to talk about that kinda stuff with. But you were the perfect person for that. Really.

RONNIE:
-Kekekeke. You know why I put you right under Julie? ;D HAHA. But Im happy for you, Ronnie. And I still remember our first heart-to-heart talk. It was because you wanted to since Johnny opened up to me. xP But Im glad we did have that talk! Its nice to open up to new people, and you simply listening to me helped out a lot. Youre really funny, Ronnie. And I like your hair. :P Sometimes I forget that our parents have known each other for a long time. I remember when we were tokboxing and we showed our moms to each other. But they didnt recognize each other. HAHAHA. Homecoming was pretty fun, yeah? For some reason .. I think IHOP was more fun. Haha. My steak was delicious.. right? You hardly ate anything. But yeah, this is for you, Ronnie. :[ Im sorry that I failed to write about you in the first place. This probably wont mean as much, so yeah. Haha. PS: I hope that chocolate sundae syrup satisfied you for your hot chocolate. Haha. And sorry that I ditched you guys. In my own house. Hahaha. Ekekeke, you guys are so cute. x]

JOHNNY:
-Fourth block on B days would suck so much without you. Im not even kidding. Haha. I enjoy passing notes back and forth with you during class when we arent allowed to talk. Lolol. I've learned so much about you through those. And you've taught me a lot of things as well. I dont know where we are right now as friends, but I feel like we're getting closer. And it feels pretty nice. Haha. Im happy for you both, Johnny. Treat her well, okay? Or I'll kick you upside the head. HAHA. Jaykaaay. Oh yeah, like I said .. you looked nice in Isiahs clothes the other day. :P

SUNSHINE:
-I always think about the times when we used to be best friends. And I have to admit, I miss you a lot. But at least we still get to talk to each other, right? And I still feel comfortable when we have those heart-to-heart conversations. I just wanted to say sorry for all those arguments we got into before. Haha, and I hope that we never get into those kinds of arguments again. I think its kinda funny that every time I think about you, I think of one thing that you said. "You and Kirby are so cute." Ah. Sunshine, you have really impacted my life so much. You probably dont even know.

ELAINE:
-Thank you for accepting me. Thank you for putting up with me. Thank you for listening to me. Thank you for keeping in touch with me. Thank you for the jokes, the laughs, and the cute stories we shared. xD Thank you for the birthday gift that supposedly had a part two, but you never got me anything after that. HAHAHAHAHAHA. I CANT BELIEVE I JUST REMEMBERED THAT. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Lolololol. Anyways, Im sorry if I havent been myself for the past couple of days. I actually posted a tumbl about you, but then I posted it as private.. so now I cant find it myself. LOL. But basically, I just want to remind you that Im still here. And I guess everything I said that one day just wasnt what you wanted to hear. And Im sorry that I failed to tell you. I dont want to get back at you, Im not seeking revenge. But please, Elaine. I really really wish you would tell me something about your personal life here and there. Sometimes I never know how you feel, or what youre thinking about, or what you want. Not just sometimes, actually. About all the time. And I know, we do have really good times together. But then when I analyze it, I cant say that I know enough about you. Because I really dont. And its probably my fault. Maybe you just havent found the time to tell me anything like that. Or maybe I dont make you feel comfortable about those things. Or maybe you just .. cant. I mean, whether thats the situation here or not, I'll learn to accept life as it is. And I think I'll manage to not know these things. Instead, I'll just hope that I know enough to still be here as your best friend 82 years from now. Or longer. I still love you, and I always will.

KYLE:
I wish I could show you more often how much I care about you. And how much it means to me when youre simply there. And seeing you happy makes me happy, honestly. I said this before, but youre like a big brother to me. You seem to be down lately, so I hope you saw my post on tumblr. Stay strong. Youre an amazing guy; Im praying for you.

SARAH:
Its kinda sad to say this, but we arent really close compared to our other friends. But hay! Lately, I have been having so much fun around you. I like you, a lot Sarah. HAHA. You make me laugh so much, oh maaaan. Youre one of the reasons why my life has been so easy-going lately. I can always find something to laugh at with you. HAHA. And its so much better when we're the only two who understand why something is funny. I have missed you so much, girrl. I feel like we missed out on so many moments we could have shared. But its okay, we can fix that now, right? Haha. I dont think Ive ever told you this; but youre so cute. Youre pretty. And youre talented. Dont let anyone take you for granted, okay? And heck yes. Dante is beautiful. HAHA. And SNUZZLES. <3 LOLOLOL. And a couple days ago, Krish asked me about you when he texted me. And this is how we spelled your name: Shara Lamon. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA.

KIRBY:
-I seem to always want to save you for last. We really have been through so much. And I will never, ever forget the way you made me feel. Nor will I ever try to forget. June 28 was really a turning point in my life. That was the day you told me that you liked me. But then you said sorry, haha. Dont ever say sorry for how you feel; its like saying sorry for being real. But anyways, I feel like you brought me into a new world. I lived a life with you that I only saw in my dreams. There is really something about you, Kirbs. Because I have never felt so important, ever. You made me feel like the most beautiful girl to ever walk into your life. You made me feel so happy. If other girls could experience the love that you gave me, their hearts would be overflowing with joy. And surprisingly, mine still is. Every time I think about you, and every time I hear your voice, hear your name, or see your smile, I get that fuzzy feeling. Haha. I used to wonder all the time where I went wrong. Every time that you didnt talk to me, I felt stupid. I felt like I was at fault. Dont worry, it wasnt your fault either. I was just overthinking too much. And Im sorry for ever making you feel like I expected too much out of you. Im sorry if I ever made you feel like you had to change for me. But dont change. Because you have such a beautiful soul, you dont even know it. I know you have flaws, but babe. We all do. And there is just something about you that makes me fall for you more and more each day, regardless of what you've done in the past, and regardless of all the compliments you fail to accept. Dont be so hard on yourself, and dont try to change who you are if someone makes you feel bad. Dont hurt yourself and dont be disappointed in who you have become. Look in the mirror, Kirby. I dont know what you see, I dont know how you feel about yourself but listen. When I look at you, I see the man of my dreams. And Im being totally honest. I see the kind of guy every girl deserves. The kind of guy who is simple, compassionate, and humble. The kind of guy who shows exactly how much they care about you. The kind of guy who makes those memories you will never want to forget. The kind of guy who makes those butterflies flutter in your stomach. The kind of guy who knows when to smile, and knows when to lend out a hand. The kind of guy everyone appreciates, but the kind of guy who doesnt become prideful. The kind of guy that loves, and seeks to be loved. The kind of guy that offers something that can last forever, not something temporary. The kind of guy who wants to be somebody. But Kirby, you already are somebody. And I know that Im not the only person who thinks that. Honey, you are a great person. One day, I hope you believe me. Because you have taught me so much. You have impacted my life in so many ways, that its almost impossible to count. You taught me how to live life the way I was supposed to. You showed me how it felt to just live in the moment. Because every moment I had with you, I wanted to replay over and over again. You really are the only person who has showed me what its like to be amazing in every single aspect. You really are the only man to understand me. You really are the only man to accept me in every way. You really are the only man to show me what its like to fall in love, and to be in love. You really are the only man that makes it impossible for me to deny how you make me feel. You really are the only man that has come by and made me feel like the their most cherishable gift of life. I remember how much you wanted to hold my hand, and how afraid I was at first. I remember how much you wanted to see me. And we finally got our chance together: those 7-8 minutes at Walmart in the junior girls section. HAHAHA. I was soooo nervous. You were too. It was so funny. I kept getting scared that my mom was going to find us. And that was the first day we held hands. I remember you took one of my hands and put it inbetween both of your hands. That moment was so magical. When I was just looking into your eyes, and they just lit up when you felt my skin. And boooooyyy, I have never texted someone so much in my life. HAHA. I wish I was smart enough to save every cute text you sent me. I could probably write a book. I remember when we used to call each other babe, baby, darling, and honey. LOLOL. You used them so well, oh my gosh. And that one morning we spent together a few days before I left for Canada. And it was my "early birthday gift." I remember you driving towards my driveway and I snuck out the back door and you got so ecstatic. I will never forget the look you had on your face once you saw me. Your smile got sooooo big, I felt too happy. Haha. And Luis, your leopard, was sitting in the front seat. I brought him upstairs into my room, and before I left him on my bed, I smelled him. HAHA. And he smelled so gooood. Just like you. Oh man. Then I ran downstairs and went into your car. It was so funny, because you were so scared that my brothers were going to wake up and kill you or something. Then you reached into the backseat of your car and said .. "since I cant be with you on your birthday, I got you these." And it was a bouquet of red roses. And you know that I could punch myself even until today for being too afraid to accept them. We were scared that mommy was going to yell at me if she found out where I got them. So we spent like 10 minutes thinking about who we could give them to. HAHAHAHA. Then once we started driving into this empty court in my neighborhood, you immediately grabbed my hand. AHHHH. I was literally jumping up and down inside my mind. Haha. And we spent about an hour together! We were just listening to music, enjoying each others company. And I remember when I first laid my head on your shoulder. Then I held your hand and I turned my face towards you to smell you again. Hahaha. Then I put my head back on your shoulder and started to play with your fingers. Then you lifted up your shoulders and kissed me on my forehead. Maaaan. I remember that like it was just yesterday. And I remember that I kept looking at your eyes, but you looked so sleepy! Haha. Im sorry that it was so early in the morning. I remember that while I was holding your hand, I would look out the window occasionally. It felt so natural to be with you. And every time a car would pass by, I would duck down and you would hide me. HAHA. Then when we had like, 10 more minutes together.. we walked outside of the car. And we hugged. A lot. It felt soooo nice because my head just rested along your chest, perfectly..almost. Haha. And I would look up at you and smile, and you would kiss my forehead again. Then after awhile, it was time for me to go. So you hugged me again and said bye. But then I was like, "Wait. One more." That was so perfect, oh my gosh. And when I got home, you texted me saying that you wanted to spend the rest of your life spending time with me like that. And we had so many precious moments together, that I could probably blog about all of them for the next three days and still not be done. Haha. But for now, since things have changed, all we can say is: thats what life is. The ups, the downs, and the turn arounds. And I know that we both wanted it to work out, and I know that we both wanted to officially be together one day and last a lifetime, but its okay. We prayed about it, and we agreed that if it wasnt Gods plan, then it wasnt. So thank you for everything, Kirby. And no, Kirby and Ria are not over yet. And I hope we never will be. Because even though we're just going to be friends, I can honestly say that Kirby gives me the most happiness nowadays. Every time Im with him, its like .. the world doesnt matter. We just have to be carefree. And yeah, I think we're both still working on transitioning and changing some things around, but thats fine. Im really really grateful that I had that talk with you, Kirby. It helped me get a lot of things off my chest. I wish you the best in everything that you do, and please. Dont ever let anyone tell you that you are not valuable. Because you are more than that. Dont ever let anyone bring you down, and dont ever believe that you ever let me down. Because you didnt. I cant even imagine you letting me down. Dont worry. Whatever happened, has happened. And we're just going to move forward, just like you said. Dont forget to always smile, and have fun. You look spectacular when you smile and laugh. I know we'll both be truly happy one day, because now I know that true happiness exists. Because of you, because of us, actually. You already know this, but Im praying for you a lot. I always am praying for you, and I always will. I will never forget you and what we had, and how it felt. And I will never regret the times we shared. You have taught me so much, and I just want to say that you have made me a much better person. I dont know what life would be like if you were never there. You made summer so much fun. You made every morning of my life something to look forward to. Maybe after awhile, I'll forget some of the words you said, and maybe I'll forget some of the things we talked about, but you will always be in my heart. I promise you that. And one more thing, I love everything about you, and Im sorry if its way too late or if its wrong to say this, but I love you Kirby Anthony Santos Manaloto. And I always will.